Thinking back...

So I lay awake unable to sleep and I got to thinking about where I was a week ago tonight....

A week ago I was laying in a hospital bed with my son William who had been admitted days earlier with trouble breathing incited by what was thought to be an asthma attack. After a day 1/2 of continuous breathing treatments his condition didn't improve... so they moved him to ICU to escalate his treatments...  I never in a million years imagined my son in an ICU bed.  It was a scary time for me and his mother. They kept saying it wasn't a big deal ...but all I kept thinking about was those 3 letters...I.C.U.  Which after I really thought about it.... it just means escalated care.

So his mom had stayed the night before, so I elected to stay that night.... and it was the longest night of my life I tell you. I was not a happy camper at the time,  quite frankly I was emotionally, mentally and physically drained. As thankful as I was that they let me stay and accommodated me with an adult bed... it just wasn't that comfortable, but it wasn't about my comfort at the time, it was about Williams comfort.  I remember rubbing his head and letting him know it was gonna be alright... and promising him that a week later we would be at the park playing.  A promise I kept I should add. I remember getting so choked up but not allowing myself to cry... I've promised myself that I'll never let my boys see me cry. lol    I remember praying and asking God to please help my son get better and make him comfortable.  Of all the times I've prayed I don't think there was ever one that felt more important.

Well God did hear my prayer because Williams condition improved dramatically overnight... and was moved back to the Respiratory Care unit .  If there was one funny moment I can recall from all this it was being wheeled down the hall of  Children's hospital in a bed my pajamas and glasses, Wm under one arm and my Blackberry of course in the other hand.  Wm was still sleeping and kind of under the covers so all people saw or seemed to focus on was this 30 something man in a hospital bed in CCHMC. Kind of awkward but still kind of funny I tell you. Felt like I was coming out of L&D without the stitches or stretch-marks.... lol

But seriously.... spending time around CCHMC for 3 1/2 days really gave me a chance to reflect and be thankful that for the most part I have two healthy beautiful boys. Sometimes it's so easy to think and say...."Why asthma..why my son"   But while I was there, sometimes just going to the cafeteria I saw so many parents of children who probably WISH that only affliction their child had was asthma.

So I am so thankful that William is back to his healthy self.  This week I've spent a lot of time just staring at him in amazement...  The comeback kid he is....

So I was just taking this opportunity to reflect...  I really hadn't talked about it or had the opportunity to until now. I do give so much thanks to God , my family, friends and the wonderful Drs. and nurses at CCHMC.  Hopefully we won't be seeing them again for a long time if ever.

Thanks for listening.



amy hunter said...

so, so true. I have an asthma kid and spent way too much time @CCHMC with my other son. We're so lucky to have a hospital like that here. Perspective and gratitude are very good things.

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