10.05.2010

Dear Anonymous....

Anonymous said...
I just stumbled on this website from google and think it's just wonderful that a gay man is sharing his fathering experience with others. Gay parents are usually under appreciated or victimized by society. If this blog changes even one person's opinion, it will an be epic success. Good luck on your journey father Ed, I am rooting for you! 


Dear Anonymous,
First,  you give me too much credit. To think I could handle the challenges of an alternative lifestyle AND raise twin boys simultaneously? Whew!  Secondly,  I have to admit,  what some readers of my blog as well as myself find perplexing is how you were able to derive from my previous posts that I was homosexual or even single for that matter.  Very interesting.

At any rate... your comment itself underscores what truly is an "under-estimated" or under-appreciated group for that matter and that is the black father...  For decades we've seen the number of "fatherless" homes in the black community increase on pace with the number of black men who enter the penal system or worse, end up dead before turning 25....  there is a direct correlation between the two trends.  It's become so commonplace or second-nature to see black children without an involved father that society has become awestruck when we see a black male being involved, hands-on, and taking responsibility for the offspring he helped bring into this world , so much that "we" make hasty generalizations and assumptions that a single black father(now that we've uncovered that) having interest in nurturing, caring, and raising his children must be gay. How sad is that?

 
"Under-estimated.... victimized by society?   Really....Anonymous?   Do you have any data or anecdotal supports even to these claims or perhaps you're just projecting?  Hmmmm..


I assure you Anonymous, I'm 100% hetero-sexual.... however if I weren't,  I have the un-wavered confidence that all those I love and care about and vice-versa would embrace me and love me just the same as well as knowing it could never come between the love I have for my beautiful sons or their love for me....just as if they one day chose an alternative lifestyle, I would love them just the same. unconditionally....   because that's what fathers or mothers for that matter do Anonymous.... love their children unconditionally.  I do hope that if you have children or plan or having children, you would love them unconditionally regardless of what lifestyle choices they make.

 
I appreciate your support nonetheless Anonymous and welcome you to continue to follow my journey, perhaps you and I can become good friends and when the day comes that I find that perfect woman to spend the rest of my life with... one who is willing to embark on this marvelous journey with me....and help me raise my two beautiful sons...  I will be sure to send you an invitation to our wedding and see to it that you have a front-row seat and be witness that blissful union.

  
Gay or straight ...one thing you and I can agree on Anonymous is that if my story can change the opinion of one person....  ONE person...  on the importance of young men.... black or white having a committed, involved, and loving father in their lives....  Then yes... it will be an epic success.



Thank you for "finding" me Anonymous...  I do hope you will continue to follow this journey.


 Best,
Father Ed

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